Recent content by MAO's Beard

I really make the man...

I'm a natural born killer. Unfortunately I'm attached to a black hole of a host. He can't kill a full Mountain Dew unless I mop up after him. Now his cousin Justin, dude is a killer much the same as I. Shame some 7th graders grow better beards or I'd have graced his presence with mine already...

Look at me, you don't get this pretty by taking orders from your human. When I need a good combing, I grab him by the short whiskers and say: "Bitch, brush me." He's such a good listener. :smiley_coolpeace: I'm a lover, not a fighter, so I let him do his fair share of the killing. But you...

Well Mike, it's all about nutrition with a good beard. Things like Busch Light, Little Debbies, beef jerky and Mountain Dew really build a good root base. Also hygiene is of the upmost importance. No more than one showe, two if you have a trip to Wal-Mart in planned, a week. A good layer of...

It's not the hot coffee or the chili. He tried to drown me in a fish tank the other night. I need not elaborate, but it was humid...

Thank you sir. I am rather well endowed...

Well I managed to get some free time away from the boss man to sign up around here. I've been lurking for a while, but have always had some wise guy pulling my whiskers. Figured since they gave me my own parking space at work last week, I'd go ahead and get my own handle here on TOO. I leave ya...