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Advice for Young Guys

at1010

*Supporting Member*
4,943
139
This is more of a serious thread but I felt it is important to share.

As many of you know about 1.5 years ago I went through a horrible breakup. It put me into a serious depression, and was just not the best time of my life to be honest. Since then I have seen so many young 20something year old guys/girls get so torn up over a breakup. I just want to give advice to all the younger people out there.

1. Time goes on, and you will get over it
2. Use this time to focus on yourself, career, hunting, etc
3. Trust in God, and know all happens for a reason
4. All those buddies you were ditching because you were worried about getting kitty everynight, give them a call and get back to those who will always be there for you.

I am not typing this to get self credit but since I went through those hard times. I focused on my career, I was able to get promoted in my company at an exponential rate espically for my age. I have a lot of responsibilty with my job, I work very hard, and have been blessed to have good success in my field so far. None of that matters though, my main point is just know all will be ok, and focus on what you love.

End of rant, just tired of seeing so many young guys so torn up over something that will most likely be a blessing in the future.

Hope this helps someone!
 

Redhunter1012

Senior Member
Supporting Member
Dude, awesome post. Really happy you're in a good place. Only advice I can add is that nothing anyone says really makes it any easier, but I believe just talking a lot to friends and people who have your best interests at heart helps you get by. Putting time between the pain and the next day and so on is what helps
 
Great advice. Break ups can be tough and depression usually comes with them.

My first wife left me unannounced after we had been together for 23 years. The hardest thing was for me to try to explain this to my 12 year old daughter. Yes, it hurt, but my brothers and sisters helped me through it. First I was sad, then angry. I was depressed, but spent a lot of time fishing and walking the parks. After a few months I decided it was time to get on with life.

I was lucky, blessed, in the right place at the right time or fate just took over. The first night I went "out" I met my current wife. We are still together 23 years later. We blended our families and we all get along and respect each other. I am as happy as I've ever been and am loving life.

So don't think that a break up is the end of the world. Yes, it gets you down, but there just may be a silver lining in your future.
 
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bowhunter1023

Owner/Operator
Staff member
48,879
274
Appalachia
Good stuff buddy. One piece of advice I will offer is the harder you look for the right one, the further you'll get from the right one. When it is meant to be, it will happen. And for Heaven's sake, when you see the writing on the wall: RUN!!!
 

at1010

*Supporting Member*
4,943
139
thanks for the responses boys. I really just see so many young guys go through what I did, I just wanna shake them and be like trust me bud.....your going to be better in the long run.

Depression is a scary thing and can put you in dark places, not to mention it can lead to serve alcohol abuse, and other substances too! I know we have a lot of young guys on this site, and it seems to continuely grow. I hope this will help some of the guys/gals through tough times!
 

teej89

Senior Member
2,288
48
NE PA
Great write up man! I was in the same boots, just moved to columbus cuz of a job. Started dating this girl and realized I never really got grounded here with making friends and what not, and the relationship went crazy fast and I was starting to pull away from her but I couldn't break up with her because I had nothing else here in columbus. Then with the help of my fam and my friends I realized I was better off without her and I needed to focus on my career and get my financials back on track. She put me in 3k of debt....... I've never been in debt before and it didn't bother her that I was. Let it be known I was supporting both of us cuz she was living with me and still trying to find a full time job. Well she just kept spending and I kept wilting to the point where I realized I can make it on my own but it'll be hard. I ended things about a month ago and I'm doing better than ever now and i'm able to focus on my career and not have to worry about finances again.

Heck of a write up, thanks man!
 

at1010

*Supporting Member*
4,943
139
Great write up man! I was in the same boots, just moved to columbus cuz of a job. Started dating this girl and realized I never really got grounded here with making friends and what not, and the relationship went crazy fast and I was starting to pull away from her but I couldn't break up with her because I had nothing else here in columbus. Then with the help of my fam and my friends I realized I was better off without her and I needed to focus on my career and get my financials back on track. She put me in 3k of debt....... I've never been in debt before and it didn't bother her that I was. Let it be known I was supporting both of us cuz she was living with me and still trying to find a full time job. Well she just kept spending and I kept wilting to the point where I realized I can make it on my own but it'll be hard. I ended things about a month ago and I'm doing better than ever now and i'm able to focus on my career and not have to worry about finances again.

Heck of a write up, thanks man!

thanks bud, happy to hear you are doing better now with your situation too!
 

epe

Senior Member
6,113
93
Lancaster
Very good advice! And if you get bored in Cbus teejay I'm in the area, if you ever want to go shooting or something..
 

Dannmann801

Dignitary Member
Supporting Member
10,640
191
Springboro
Good job puttin' it out there brothers -
I keep telling my daughter that you've got to be ok with yourself before you're any good for anyone else. At 31 I think she's finally starting to get it.

Never forget - it's a time tested, axiomatic fact, without dispute, a rock-hard commandment that will never change -
Bitches be crazy.
 

easy_e

Junior Member
15
0
SE Ohio
This is a great post fellas. Kinda what I needed to hear. I just went through a horrible divorce. I'm only 25 years old and have a little girl that will be 2 in January. Really tears me up because of that reason. But after it was all said and done and I worked through the being sad part of it all, I had to take a step back and look at things differently. I still go through rough days and I am still pissed off a lot because of things the piece of work still does, but in reality things are getting better. Like others have said, hanging out with friends and focusing on hobbies has helped a lot. Spending time with my daughter always makes everything OK and I thank God I have her. Definitely a rough few months for me, but things a starting to look up.
 
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at1010

*Supporting Member*
4,943
139
thank you to all who read this post, responded. I really hope it helps to read these types of things.

BTW I am typing this from New Orelans, LA! Sometimes a change can throw your life into a total new direction, but it CAN be a good one.

PS. they call it NAW LEANS! hahaha hope yall have a good night!